Dealbreakers

Labor Day is about two things: freedom and respect. So, in that spirit, I thought I’d weigh into the discussion of romantic dealbreakers.

Here are mine:

1. Picky eaters and the food-indifferent. I’m a good cook. You’ve got to eat what’s put in front of you and like it.

2. Beards. Unless you’re a legitimate sea captain, no. No way.

3. Deadbeats. I don’t care if you’re broke, but you’ve got to be responsible.

4. Condom crybabies. 

5. Silent types.

6. Tobacco smokers.

7. Apolitical types.

8. Theists, all kinds: monotheists, polytheists, pantheists. Deists okay.

9. Asexuals.

10. Multilevel marketers.

With self-evident exceptions, these are not character flaws. This is not advice on how to be more attractive to women in general. This is not a criticism of you.